the bone
toss it high into the sky
see its twisting spiral descent
wonder of its internal lattice
easy for the eyes yes
looking to the sky
and imagine the reality of freedom
the cage of person
the relief of one
imagining the possible
touches into sweetness
the only one
-Lahmadaj
Saturday, December 10, 2011
Friday, November 4, 2011
oma
will you go
and wait for us
the turning earth
love the love
finding a golden stone
will we stay to see the rise the fall
continuous water elated
i'll smile thinking of you
in the light of sun and bird song
may my worth be great
and you to dancing
-Lahmadaj
and wait for us
the turning earth
love the love
finding a golden stone
will we stay to see the rise the fall
continuous water elated
i'll smile thinking of you
in the light of sun and bird song
may my worth be great
and you to dancing
-Lahmadaj
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Even
watching others
one's self is lost
at least my self
learned to give it
everyone can be this way
that is not true
easy lives and children houses
makes me jealous
even still
I grow old
my inside is the same
not sure where
eats a lot of creation
tells one to sleep
wish I were gone or free
would like to be more fortified
perhaps in the distance
-Lahmadaj
one's self is lost
at least my self
learned to give it
everyone can be this way
that is not true
easy lives and children houses
makes me jealous
even still
I grow old
my inside is the same
not sure where
eats a lot of creation
tells one to sleep
wish I were gone or free
would like to be more fortified
perhaps in the distance
-Lahmadaj
Saturday, October 15, 2011
spoken
to the ear of one
Jupiter high a path to moon
can't believe the shine
light inside warm curved surface
easy to see
one day
hope for
something
near to the excitement
and power below
will look for you
-Lahmadaj
Jupiter high a path to moon
can't believe the shine
light inside warm curved surface
easy to see
one day
hope for
something
near to the excitement
and power below
will look for you
-Lahmadaj
Even in Night
your shine is apparent
didn't realize you were so inspired
handsome eyes framed by geometry
would you lean closer
speaking
jovial in the smoke
i have nothing to say because you mesmerize me with your powerful words
i completely understand
will you and i meet
in the space of no time
perhaps
-Lahmadaj
didn't realize you were so inspired
handsome eyes framed by geometry
would you lean closer
speaking
jovial in the smoke
i have nothing to say because you mesmerize me with your powerful words
i completely understand
will you and i meet
in the space of no time
perhaps
-Lahmadaj
Saturday, September 17, 2011
I laugh
and think to myself
about the times i've accidentally sold my truth for the social ease
i waste my time thinking and imagining the froth of possibilities
look back and see myself the same despite my growing age
wonder when i can share this with another
there was one; no longer
myself again and the earth
like the first day
wonder if I'll change myself into something new
a pattern repeated a pattern
i'm unhinged compared to most americans
still chained to the cycle
vices
loneliness
inadequate resources
finite
I think and laugh to myself
despite all this
the air still feels so good
the light meets my eye
and my skin delivers
-Lahmadaj
about the times i've accidentally sold my truth for the social ease
i waste my time thinking and imagining the froth of possibilities
look back and see myself the same despite my growing age
wonder when i can share this with another
there was one; no longer
myself again and the earth
like the first day
wonder if I'll change myself into something new
a pattern repeated a pattern
i'm unhinged compared to most americans
still chained to the cycle
vices
loneliness
inadequate resources
finite
I think and laugh to myself
despite all this
the air still feels so good
the light meets my eye
and my skin delivers
-Lahmadaj
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Ren Hoek
"Oh cru-el fate, what is this heinous trick thou hast played upon me!?"
Labels:
death,
glorious,
Ren and Stimpy,
Ren Hoek,
retirement
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
old dudes
so my old dude calls me up today
we hang out sometimes though we are no longer lovers
we love each other
we don't have sex
we aren't together
we talk occasionally
we sometimes play tennis or ride bikes
we've been trying to play the last week but our schedules don't work well
i tried calling him today because i was thinking about him
kept thinking about his glasses and his eyes
worked sort of late
got off work and felt the descent of the brain swell mind hell
life's depression forever lingering
one day it will stop-- hey kids, do you know when that is?
he calls me up after i eat dinner
cool to talk to him
he tells me all his successes about the job offers he's accepted and the multiple positions he is getting that he didn't think would work out but everything seems to be working well and he is hooked up and he was worrying about it for weeks and acting like he'd never get a job or have his dreams fulfilled. but now he's getting a raise and a great new position and another avenue is opening
he tells me about it tonight on the phone
i am glad to hear he got them, honestly, because i am also proud of him
but as i listen, i begin to feel inadequate myself; please see the brain swell hell already in place
towards the end of our conversation, that has now gone on for an hour of shared topics and him telling me his successes and relief for such a great day and the gratitude he felt for his life,
he states: oh and A, i wanted to talk to you about something. i don't think you've been a very good friend lately. it was awkward hanging out with you such and such a day. you seemed distant and different.
i couldn't recall a reason why, and i don't know if one existed other than we don't hang out that often any more and i had some things on my mind while playing tennis; who knows
now the cloud is suddenly darker and looms from months old
relationship sludge thickly coating my shoulders and feet
fuck this again; he's so good at the mind fuck, and innocently so
tactless
spent 2 years thrown about his innocent manipulation and diva like hijinks
and my own characteristics flailing
eventually we got off the phone
to plan another day to hang
i'd like to but wonder if i'll be more myself now that he's said weird shit, a good chance not
but i may be able to handle it; freedom
now i'll spend the next hours of wakefulness ignoring our conversation and all the words he said bouncing around my skull
i'll think about dying and the hell which is human awareness and love when collided with ego
i'll try to read a book or soothe my mind
or listen to music
or tend my plants
but inside i'll know it is all still there
all the love and understanding
all the mysterious unknowns
the awareness of the infinite expanse of all
and the feeling of the inability to share it entirely
and i'll hope to forget everything
the song
-Lahmadaj
we hang out sometimes though we are no longer lovers
we love each other
we don't have sex
we aren't together
we talk occasionally
we sometimes play tennis or ride bikes
we've been trying to play the last week but our schedules don't work well
i tried calling him today because i was thinking about him
kept thinking about his glasses and his eyes
worked sort of late
got off work and felt the descent of the brain swell mind hell
life's depression forever lingering
one day it will stop-- hey kids, do you know when that is?
he calls me up after i eat dinner
cool to talk to him
he tells me all his successes about the job offers he's accepted and the multiple positions he is getting that he didn't think would work out but everything seems to be working well and he is hooked up and he was worrying about it for weeks and acting like he'd never get a job or have his dreams fulfilled. but now he's getting a raise and a great new position and another avenue is opening
he tells me about it tonight on the phone
i am glad to hear he got them, honestly, because i am also proud of him
but as i listen, i begin to feel inadequate myself; please see the brain swell hell already in place
towards the end of our conversation, that has now gone on for an hour of shared topics and him telling me his successes and relief for such a great day and the gratitude he felt for his life,
he states: oh and A, i wanted to talk to you about something. i don't think you've been a very good friend lately. it was awkward hanging out with you such and such a day. you seemed distant and different.
i couldn't recall a reason why, and i don't know if one existed other than we don't hang out that often any more and i had some things on my mind while playing tennis; who knows
now the cloud is suddenly darker and looms from months old
relationship sludge thickly coating my shoulders and feet
fuck this again; he's so good at the mind fuck, and innocently so
tactless
spent 2 years thrown about his innocent manipulation and diva like hijinks
and my own characteristics flailing
eventually we got off the phone
to plan another day to hang
i'd like to but wonder if i'll be more myself now that he's said weird shit, a good chance not
but i may be able to handle it; freedom
now i'll spend the next hours of wakefulness ignoring our conversation and all the words he said bouncing around my skull
i'll think about dying and the hell which is human awareness and love when collided with ego
i'll try to read a book or soothe my mind
or listen to music
or tend my plants
but inside i'll know it is all still there
all the love and understanding
all the mysterious unknowns
the awareness of the infinite expanse of all
and the feeling of the inability to share it entirely
and i'll hope to forget everything
the song
-Lahmadaj
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
--
'I'm an American
not a bump in the road'
as a fellow rebel-slave of the giant monster
i think we may just be a bump in the road
the trick is to send them flying
or to not be on the road
-Lahmadaj
not a bump in the road'
as a fellow rebel-slave of the giant monster
i think we may just be a bump in the road
the trick is to send them flying
or to not be on the road
-Lahmadaj
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Thursday, June 2, 2011
..
America!
we'll constantly lie to ourselves and each other
America!
it's mine, i want it, you're my competition
America!
cold war yeah, hide your head, show me your teeth
don't forget to bitch about nothing
America!
hey that's what i'm doing.
-Lahmadaj
we'll constantly lie to ourselves and each other
America!
it's mine, i want it, you're my competition
America!
cold war yeah, hide your head, show me your teeth
don't forget to bitch about nothing
America!
hey that's what i'm doing.
-Lahmadaj
Friday, May 20, 2011
well
I guess since the rapture is delayed/non-existent
we'll all have to start taking responsibility for ourselves
oh wait, we can just make up something else to relinquish reality to the imaginary
-------------------
infinite wheel
won't you try stepping off
-Lahmadaj
we'll all have to start taking responsibility for ourselves
oh wait, we can just make up something else to relinquish reality to the imaginary
-------------------
infinite wheel
won't you try stepping off
-Lahmadaj
Labels:
christians,
existence,
guess,
imaginary,
infinite,
oops,
rapture,
reality,
responsibility,
wheel
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Catch you later Harpo
Oprah
many celebrities showed up to say thanks/goodbye at her double, 2nd to last, episode.
all sorts of glitz showed to say gush gush to the rich woman
"Oprah Winfrey, because of you women everywhere have graduated to a new level of understanding of who we are, of what we are and, most of all, who we can be," Beyoncé said. Chicago AP
yeah except normal women. Beyonce, Madonna, enter fan of stars (paycheck anyone)
you're not horrible Oprah, but you are not realistic, you are grandeur of american wealth that all the midwest ladies pine for and keep miniature models of close to their hearts and clitorides
Oprah, if you see this, I could use a new car, or maybe a vacation to some exotic place like NYC or even Portland, or even a chance to 'make my dreams come true'
sometimes not sure if I'm cutthroat enough for the amassing of uselessness
thank the sun for music
thank my ears
will sing in my death
and escape the earth
also to remain
-Lahmadaj
many celebrities showed up to say thanks/goodbye at her double, 2nd to last, episode.
all sorts of glitz showed to say gush gush to the rich woman
"Oprah Winfrey, because of you women everywhere have graduated to a new level of understanding of who we are, of what we are and, most of all, who we can be," Beyoncé said. Chicago AP
yeah except normal women. Beyonce, Madonna, enter fan of stars (paycheck anyone)
you're not horrible Oprah, but you are not realistic, you are grandeur of american wealth that all the midwest ladies pine for and keep miniature models of close to their hearts and clitorides
Oprah, if you see this, I could use a new car, or maybe a vacation to some exotic place like NYC or even Portland, or even a chance to 'make my dreams come true'
sometimes not sure if I'm cutthroat enough for the amassing of uselessness
thank the sun for music
thank my ears
will sing in my death
and escape the earth
also to remain
-Lahmadaj
Flight Numbers 93 and 175
"Out of respect for those who lost their lives and those who will always remember our heroes, United Airlines must do what should have already been done — immediately and permanently retire these flight numbers," said Greg Davidowitch, president of the Association of Flight Attendants.
Wendy Morse, a United captain and an official with the Air Line Pilots Association unit representing United pilots, said "the thought of anyone among management at United Airlines to even consider reinstating these two sacred flight numbers — on the heels of Osama bin Laden's death — demonstrates a severe disconnect from right and wrong."
-AP
----------
I do not mean to disrespect anyone involved in the 9/11 flight disasters.
But seriously, 'sacred flight numbers'
they are numbers
they appear everywhere
this shouts 21st century insanity
aren't there more important things to worry about
like why the daughter of a flight victim is still being fed all the american lies and gender role associations she'll spend the rest of her life cherishing as a get into heaven for free pass, or spend a life time trying to cast off while seeking truth, all of which is a bit depressing.
maybe I'm insane
-Lahmadaj
Wendy Morse, a United captain and an official with the Air Line Pilots Association unit representing United pilots, said "the thought of anyone among management at United Airlines to even consider reinstating these two sacred flight numbers — on the heels of Osama bin Laden's death — demonstrates a severe disconnect from right and wrong."
-AP
----------
I do not mean to disrespect anyone involved in the 9/11 flight disasters.
But seriously, 'sacred flight numbers'
they are numbers
they appear everywhere
this shouts 21st century insanity
aren't there more important things to worry about
like why the daughter of a flight victim is still being fed all the american lies and gender role associations she'll spend the rest of her life cherishing as a get into heaven for free pass, or spend a life time trying to cast off while seeking truth, all of which is a bit depressing.
maybe I'm insane
-Lahmadaj
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Sunday, May 1, 2011
o my bike
what lovely reeling
take your time
watch his smiling face
turn turn
wheel we'll go
could do this forever
in the light of setting sun
the pace of legs
the crow
flash of teeth
one
-Lahmadaj
take your time
watch his smiling face
turn turn
wheel we'll go
could do this forever
in the light of setting sun
the pace of legs
the crow
flash of teeth
one
-Lahmadaj
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
thanks
for returning the key
thanks
for locking yourself out
thanks for removing me from
all your bull shit
even though I love you
now I can play alone
with only my own bull shit
'pound you out of my head'
-Lahmadaj
thanks
for locking yourself out
thanks for removing me from
all your bull shit
even though I love you
now I can play alone
with only my own bull shit
'pound you out of my head'
-Lahmadaj
Friday, March 18, 2011
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
don't know
why you're the one
so much driving me crazy
rev
the idle listlessness
a pace of evolution
the rain falls hard
continuous
to earth
leaping frog
-Lahmadaj
so much driving me crazy
rev
the idle listlessness
a pace of evolution
the rain falls hard
continuous
to earth
leaping frog
-Lahmadaj
hey look
family
i'm not a loser
forgot to e-mail you to let you know
i've got my own apartment now
i even have a few friends
not saving the starving children
but i feed a lot of them music
hey look
i'm not a wasted soul
got my own place
got a job
made a friend
moving up
i think i see the beginnings of air
pulled from the earth
-Lahmadaj
i'm not a loser
forgot to e-mail you to let you know
i've got my own apartment now
i even have a few friends
not saving the starving children
but i feed a lot of them music
hey look
i'm not a wasted soul
got my own place
got a job
made a friend
moving up
i think i see the beginnings of air
pulled from the earth
-Lahmadaj
Sunday, March 6, 2011
one
of my friends
one of the only
will fly into my city
in the heated August month
should be grand to see him
better than most anything
one thing
will be
lengths of sky
laugh I laugh
-Lahmadaj
one of the only
will fly into my city
in the heated August month
should be grand to see him
better than most anything
one thing
will be
lengths of sky
laugh I laugh
-Lahmadaj
there are his eyes
looking at mine
he tells me words
out loud
he rarely says what's below
this burns
seems alive and smiles
touches lips
can hear breathing
what depression
to have the infinite light
hidden
looks at me
lost my shining
sometime in the years
thinking of when this all stops
i'll wait and wait and wait
may be birds
-Lahmadaj
he tells me words
out loud
he rarely says what's below
this burns
seems alive and smiles
touches lips
can hear breathing
what depression
to have the infinite light
hidden
looks at me
lost my shining
sometime in the years
thinking of when this all stops
i'll wait and wait and wait
may be birds
-Lahmadaj
Saturday, March 5, 2011
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